Weathering the storm - this too shall pass

By Sharmane Adams |  The Catholic Compass  |  March/April 2022

Everyone has gone through difficulties and setbacks in life. Depending on the situation at hand, it can be hard to bounce back and move forward. To say that Zac McCay has overcome adversity in life is an understatement. Since childhood, the obstacles Zac has encountered are something you are more likely to read in a book about the saints. 

Zac was sexually abused as a child. He started experimenting with drugs and alcohol in his teens to mask the pain. In high school, he found out that his girlfriend was pregnant. The two teens discussed the possibility of getting an abortion, but Zac felt that his conscience was telling him to keep the baby. To Zac’s dismay, the girl’s parents withdrew their daughter from school, moved her to another state, and told her the pregnancy would be terminated. 

Zac learned from a mutual friend the date and time of the scheduled abortion in Birmingham. His mom and friends drove to Alabama to try to stop the procedure. “The first time protesting at an abortion clinic was to save the life of my child,” Zac said. “I remember her parents’ car pulling up at the clinic, and my girlfriend was in the back seat. When they saw us, they pulled right out of the parking lot. Come to find out, the appointment was rescheduled.” 

Through a series of unexpected turns, Zac was headed down a darker path. “I became unhinged. I shut people off and dove headfirst right into the drug and alcohol scene. I started selling drugs and using everything I could imagine,” Zac said. “I partied like a rock star.”

In the course of a few years, Zac was arrested many times. His mom told him that she would no longer help him unless he went to treatment in Atlanta. Zac said she was throwing him a lifeline and he had to make a choice to accept it. “That’s how twisted and weird my mentality was back then. The thought of not having drugs and alcohol was unbearable,” he said. 

When Zac checked into the treatment center, he agreed to stay 90 days. “At some point during the first 90 days, I told them that I wasn’t qualified to make decisions for myself. I wanted them to tell me when I was ready to leave. I ended up staying 14 months,” Zac laughed.

During treatment, Zac developed friendships with others just like himself. Experiencing life and hardships in a safe community allowed him to learn how to stay clean. “I needed to stay in that community to experience real-life situations,” Zac said. In the year Zac was there, he dealt with the death of his grandparent and a breakup with his girlfriend. 

While at the treatment center, Zac was required to attend religious services once a week. He recalls visiting 20 different churches — including Quaker, Baptist, Catholic and Jewish places of worship — searching for the truth. He had a hunger for the truth and credited the treatment center for his faith journey in finding the truth in the Catholic Church. Zac was confirmed in 2007.

Zac was hesitant about leaving Atlanta because he didn’t want to lose that safety net. His mom and stepdad offered him a position at the nursing home they owned in Pensacola. Although hesitant, Zac was excited about the new career opportunity. It wasn’t long after starting his job that he met the love of his life, Maria, who also worked there. “When we got married, I had no idea what a gift God blessed me with,” Zac said. The McCays have eight children ranging in age from 5 to 23.

It hasn’t been a walk in the park for the McCay family through the years. Zac said his marriage has been on the brink of divorce twice with various stresses: they lost their first house, the nursing home was sold, and he lost his job. “Throughout my marriage, I have had storms that I didn’t think I could weather, but I feel like God was saying, ‘Sit tight, this storm will soon pass.’ Through it all, Maria has supported me physically, spiritually and financially. I would be nothing without her.”

One gorgeous, cool, breezy day in May 2019, Zac picked up his newly purchased motorcycle in Destin. While traveling home, he had a terrible motorcycle accident. “All throughout my spiritual journey and marriage, I could see God making things happen,  and I could see God’s grace. He would say, ‘I got this.’ When I wrecked, I felt like God was telling me that again while lying on the pavement. While the first responders were checking on me, I could see people surrounding me and praying. I remember looking back and thinking, ‘Oh my gosh. I am good.’ Seeing people praying for me assured me that God had this situation,” Zac said. Once at the hospital, Zac realized the severity of his injuries; his leg would have to be amputated.

Zac began to realize the impact of Christ’s love through his people. On the day of the wreck, Zac had a friend from his 12-step group who started a GoFundMe account to help cover outstanding medical expenses. Within 24 hours, the initial goal of $10,000 exceeded the amount. A total of $35,000 was raised. 

Zac documented his recovery by making Facebook videos to update his family and friends. Parishioners and the priests from his parish, St. Paul Catholic Church, were on the front lines helping his family. The Men of St. Joseph and Acts Retreat members recon-figured his home to make it wheelchair accessible. “Guys would show up from my recovery community and cut my grass. My church community started a meal train. They provided meals every day for two months. The experience was overwhelming and brought me to tears,” Zac said. 

During his recovery, Zac had another setback. Infection settled in his bone and he had to have another amputation on the same leg. He experienced excruciating pain, and most of the time he couldn’t get out of bed. 

After Zac received his prosthetic leg and was walking comfortably, he knew he needed to get off the pain medicine because of his addiction to drugs. “I had to be honest with myself. The pain pills weren’t working. All the trauma had healed, and now I was dealing with nerve pain. The pills weren’t helping the nerve pain. In recovery, they say that you always have a relapse in you. You may not always have a recovery in you,” Zac said. After seven months of taking pain medicine, Zac weaned himself off in five days. 

Nearly two years later, Zac frequently receives calls from his doctors asking him to speak with other patients going through similar situations. He notes the biggest blessings in his life are his wife, children, parents and community of friends. 

“If we go through suffering with the right attitude, there is tremendous grace on the other side. I made it a point that I wanted to suffer well. Every day I would wake up asking myself how I would suffer well. How well I met that intention was secondary to having the intention,” Zac said.